Stop — think twice about Suicide

There isn’t a good reason to end your life. If your heart was broken, you were kicked out of your church, you aren’t talking to your family, your therapist ended the relationship to have a friendship with your ex, you disappointed someone by your actions, you emailed too many times, you overburdened someone, you are a trans and no one understands, your religion tells you that you are going to hell, you lost your friends, you got embarrassed, or you feel no one gets you.

I am here living saying that life gets better. It doesn’t get easier but it does get better. Yes, we are all going to die. But that isn’t our choice as to when. No one gets out alive but our job is to live until we die. When you are depressed you are tunnel visioned. You do not see any hope. So hold onto what I have to say.

You matter. You are important. You are loved. You are worthy. I know this for you. You are allowed to make mistakes and regroup and change. You are allowed to get back up again from falling and move forward. You are allowed to let things change.

I am not saying these words to say what you want to hear. I am saying them because I have lived them. I have struggled with living. It would have been such a waste of my life if I had taken my own. Because the very reason that I thought I should in the long run I was wrong.

My family did love me even though they can’t always show me in the way I need. I can make friends who tell me difficult things but still stay in my life. I can belong to a church that kicked me out. I can belong to another church that demonstrates unconditional love.

I can have a therapist that isn’t codependent, shows me solid boundaries, and accepts my transgenderness as a blessing and not an excuse to not treat me. I can find a workplace who provides me challenges but isn’t in a toxic environment.

Yes, I can find love from myself so whatever occurs in my life I don’t give up. It has taken a lot of work to get to the place that I now am. But I am telling you that you are worth it. I have also lost a friend to suicide and there isn’t a day goes by that I don’t miss her.

You will be missed. You were loved. Things happen in life we don’t understand but if you wait long enough, you will find the very reason that you wanted to end your life wasn’t about you. It was about the other person. So do not end your life based on anyone else. If you do, it will be a waste. People, places and things change. Allow that change to occur.

I promise you with my whole heart that life gets better. Please do not give up on life. I know for you that you can do it. Thank you for letting me share.